things

help me!
1. Now that food has replaced sex in my life, I can't even get into my own pants.

2. Marriage changes passion. Suddenly you're in bed with a relative.

3. I saw a woman wearing a sweat shirt with "Guess" on it. So I said "Implants?" She hit me.

4. I don't do drugs. I get the same effect just standing up fast.

5. Sign in a Chinese Pet Store: "Buy one dog, get one flea.."

6. I live in my own little world. But it's OK. They know me here.

7. I got a sweater for Christmas. I really wanted a screamer or a moaner.

8. If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?

9. I don't approve of political jokes. I've seen too many of them get elected.

10. There are two sides to every divorce: Yours and The Fool's.

11. I love being married. It's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.

12. I am a nobody, and nobody is perfect; therefore, I am perfect.

13. Everyday I beat my own previous record for number of consecutive days I've stayed alive.

14 Why is it that most nudists are people you don't want to see naked?

15. Snowmen fall from Heaven unassembled.

16. Every time I walk into a singles bar I can hear Mom's wise words:
"Don't pick that up, you don't know where it's been.”


these are true, very well written and entertaining. jokers are always quick witted. nalingaw ko..

Posted by: Lotis May 21, 2007 07:14 AM

gwapa

Posted by: Lotis May 21, 2007 07:15 AM

Hi Lotis
Thanks hope your ok,
Added a couple of extra things today hope you like them.
:-)
Melody

Posted by: melody May 26, 2007 11:26 PM