The Worlds Most Stupid Christmas Gifts

As Christmas gets closer and closer with every passing day most of us will be racking our brains wondering what we can possibly buy for our friends and family,
The problem could be that you are trying too hard to buy them something nice!
why not forget about getting them something they will like and get them something completely stupid :-)

So here are some idea's of the most stupid Christmas gifts ever,

For Him

Perfect for any alcoholic boyfriend or husband with this wonderful Beer can and bottle holder belt will enable the love of your life to take to always carry enough beer to get him smashed with it he can effortlessly take his beer with him if he is out for a walk in the park or a day in work.



He will be so merry and gay this Christmas when he finds out you have bought him this wonderful book 'Cross Dress for Success' I'm sure he wont be able to put it down.



For Her

Give her a big, big surprise this Christmas with the worlds Largest bra!
You've heard of C-Cups. You've heard of D-Cups. Well, if you put the rest of the alphabet together, you might come close to describing this humongous, mind blowing brassiere.
it is over 3-Feet wide so she won't have to worry about having some extra Christmas pudding

Or give her what she has always dreamed of— A Divorce. This book promises “a thorough overview of the divorce process” and the great thing is this present might even save you money in the long run.

For the Mother in-law

They will feel all warm and fuzzy every time they take a bath or a shower with this delightful Crime Scene Towel featuring a chalk outline of a murder victim, it would be a crime not to get this for your Mother in-Law this Christmas.

For the Kids

Just imagine the look look of pure excitement and joy on there little faces when they take of the wrapping paper off to see this Librarian Action Figure!

She even has Amazing push button REALISTIC SHUSHING ACTION!

The Librarian Action Figure captures librarians' fierce yet friendly spirit. It's modeled after Nancy Pearl, a real-life librarian currently working in the U.S. Seattle area.

COMPLETE WITH BOOKS AND OTHER GREAT STUFF!
As an extra bonus, each package includes a miniature stack of random literature. You also get a brief history of libraries and a realistic check-out card in a classic library sleeve. Plus, you get two bookmarks and -- best of all -- a Nancy Pearl trading card! With all of that they really will be the envy of all of there friends.

A new Super Hero Batdog.

A new Super hero has emerged in the crime fighting world so bad guys beware and his name is

BATDOG

ohhh poor doggie the look on his face :-( he really does look as if he is saying "why are you doing this to me"

He could always stop the super Villains by just making them feel sorry for him or by making them roll around in laughter.

We watched Underdog at the movies a little while ago, I though it was quite a good film, it's always such a good excuse to say your just taking your kids to see a film when really you want to watch it yourself, maybe Batdog could be Underdogs sidekick.

How to get Lazy police there like a shot!

This newspaper article really made me laugh so please read it as I'm sure it will make you laugh too,

What a great way to deal with Lazy police, I find it so funny because my boyfriend Matt, had is old house broken into before and when the Police were rang they said they could not come until the next day,

The UK police have also said in the past that people breaking into your car and stealing things like the CD player is a (Non-reportable crime) how are they ever going to catch anyone if you can't even report it?.

Hunt for rapist that has simply disappeared.....

"Dispute a intensive worldwide search and huge teams of investigates attempting to track down a rapist they have been unable to find him and it seems he has simply disappeared a police spokesman said that they have no leads and said that he may have gone into hiding but said they think it's possible he is a creature of habit and it is possible he might be closer than people think"

A TV news reporter showing a composite sketch of a rapist. ... poor news guy they do look so similar , People have their own perceptions on what are significant traits to differentiate one person from another. That is why an artist's sketch almost never looks like the intended individual if compared side by side, shame on a reader, I wonder if police investigated the reporter after watching the news?, wonderfully ironic.

Image of the week

Image Of The Week

What all road construction signs should read

Instead of "merge left" or "road construction ahead", most of us translate those signs into "you'll never get to work on time, haha!". i find this funny, how bout u?

Image of the week

This picture shows a boy upset that a girl took his fish. He has a comical angry look on his face as he looks up and says, 'Bitch stole my fish.' wHAT A little gangster:-) i find this funny, saves my day.

The humor is, she didn't really steal the fish.,but it looks like it.lol

NIKE SPONSERED TIGER WOODS $100 MILLON FOR A FIVE YEAR DEAL!

NIKE SPONSERED TIGER WOODS $100 MILLON FOR A FIVE YEAR DEAL.
HERE IS A PICTURE OF HIM THE DAY HE SIGNED THE CONTRACT...

To Alcohol…

According to..........
All right, brain, I don't like you and you don't like me - so let's just do this and I'll get back to killing you with beer.
Homer Simpson

I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the morning, that's as good as they're going to feel all day.
Frank Sinatra

The problem with some people is that when they aren't drunk, they're sober.
William Butler Yeats

An intelligent man is sometimes forced to be drunk to spend time with his fools.
Ernest Hemingway

Always do sober what you said you'd do drunk. That will teach you to keep your mouth shut.
Ernest Hemingway

You're not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on.
Dean Martin

Drunk is feeling sophisticated when you can't say it.
Anonymous

No animal ever invented anything as bad as drunkenness - or as good as drink.
G.K. Chesterton

Time is never wasted when you're wasted all the time.
Catherine Zandonella

Abstainer: a weak person who yields to the temptation of denying himself a pleasure.
Ambrose Bierce

Reality is an illusion that occurs due to lack of alcohol.
Anonymous

Drinking provides a beautiful excuse to pursue the one activity that truly gives me pleasure, hooking up with fat hairy girls.
Ross Levy

A woman drove me to drink and I didn't even have the decency to thank her.
W.C. Fields

What contemptible scoundrel has stolen the cork to my lunch ?
W.C. Fields

Beauty lies in the hands of the beer holder.
Anonymous

If God had intended us to drink beer, He would have given us stomachs.
David Daye

Work is the curse of the drinking classes.
Oscar Wilde

When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading.
Henny Youngman

Life is a waste of time, time is a waste of life, so get wasted all of the time and have the time of your life.
Michelle Mastrolacasa

I'd rather have a full bottle in front of me, than a full frontal lobotomy.
Tom Waits

24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case. Coincidence ?
Stephen Wright

When we drink, we get drunk. When we get drunk, we fall asleep. When we fall asleep, we commit no sin. When we commit no sin, we go to heaven. Sooooo, let's all get drunk, and go to heaven...
Brian O'Rourke

You can't be a real country unless you have a beer and an airline - it helps if you have some kind of a football team, or some nuclear weapons, but at the very least you need a beer.
Frank Zappa

Always remember that I have taken more out of alcohol than alcohol has taken out of me.
Winston Churchill

He was a wise man who invented beer.
Plato

Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy.
Benjamin Franklin

If you ever reach total enlightenment while drinking beer, I bet it makes beer shoot out your nose.
Deep Thought, Jack Handy

Without question, the greatest invention in the history of mankind is beer. Oh, I grant you that the wheel was also a fine invention, but the wheel does not go nearly as well with pizza.
Dave Barry

The problem with the world is that everyone is a few drinks behind.
Humphrey Bogart


Why is Australian beer served cold ? So you can tell it from urine.
David Moulton

Give me a woman who loves beer and I will conquer the world.
Kaiser Wilhelm


Not all chemicals are bad. Without chemicals such as hydrogen and oxygen, for example, there would be no way to make water, a vital ingredient in beer.
Anonymous

I drink to make other people interesting.
George Jean Nathan

I would kill everyone in this room for a drop of sweet beer.
Homer Simpson CHEERS!

The Boss.

VISUAL ILLUSIONS CAN YOU TRUST YOUR EYES

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